Thursday 29 September 2011

Happy Birthday NBB!!!!!

For Mr Northern Banjo Boy.



All the best mate,,

Mark.

Bdumtisch!!!

Afternoon Strumpets,




In the first in a (very) fleeting series on GNS, I`m going to post a joke. I`ll try and not be all Ronnie Corbett about it (not a bad thing to be Ronnie Corbett, if you`re Ronnie Corbett that is), and it`s a gag told to Robin Williams by Walter Cronkite. To quote Mr Williams Mr Kronkite "liked his humour the same way he liked his ocean.....blue"

You have been warned!

A couple are enjoying carnal activities whilst in bed one evening when suddenly they are disturbed by a creaking door. jumping up they look over to see little Timmy standing in the doorway with a look of abject horror on his face. With an almighty groan Timmy runs from the doorway. "Christ what should i do" asks the man, "follow him, and explain what was going on, he`s of an age where he should learn these things" replies his wife.

The man follows the cries to Timmys room and tenderly explains the act and function of sexual intercourse. Timmy says he understands and is soon fast asleep. The man returns to his room and reassures his wife that everything is just fine.

An hour later they are awakened by a bloodcurdling scream. The man sits bolt upright and runs to where the screams are coming from. Opening the bedroom door he see`s a sight which drags the breath straight from his lungs. Little timmy is on top of his Grandmother humping away "Oh my God" the man yells.

Looking over his shoulder Timmy shouts

"Not so funny when it`s YOUR Mother is it?"

Bdumtisch.

Till the next one learn something new.

Mark.

Friday 23 September 2011

Billy cutting the mustard.

Evening Strumpets,

I`ve just posted a phrase "I can`t cut the mustard like I used to", and it reminded of one of my favourite songs of Mr Connolly`s. When I first heard this I was nearly 18. That was yesterday wasn`t it?



Till the next one, learn something new.

Mark.

First gig parts 2 & 3.

Evening Strumpets,

It`s been a looooooonnnggg long day. Can`t cut the mustard like I used to.

Here`s the final two segments of the Gig from last night.






Hope you like.

Till the next one, learn something new.

Mark.

Our first gig, part 1.

Morning Strumpets,

Very tender this morning, much enjoyment had last night.

So here is the first of three vids from the night.



Till the next one learn something new,

Mark.

Wednesday 21 September 2011

Fly Me to the Moon and Sun!

Afternoon Strumpets,

Tomorrow night sees the first gig played by the Alice Charmers in their current line up of Andy, Carl, Mark and myself. We`re playing a set at Doc Browns in Boro, a place where i have played solo, with Carl, and with Carl and Andy. If you can, see if you can get there. It should be a reet belter.

Mr Jason Roper has asked me to post a couple of the Rat Pack songs onto the blog, so here`s my rendition of "Fly me to the Moon". More to follow over the next week Mr Roper!



I also played my first gig at The Sun Inn in Stockton. It was a really nice set up with a couple of bands (Product of Mexico, and Dinnernanny who all seem to be called Paul, hence the dedications before each song, and gave out free cake) who were really nice chaps. Unfortunately during me set a rather loud group of young chaps came in a bit worse for wear, and proceeded to shout amongst themselves and then get kicked out, so i`ve only included the first couple of songs I did, as the rest is just obscured. My particular facourite piece is where I stop for the people to join in on "All you need is Love" and for the first time that night the place is silent!



Practice tonight with the Charmers, and then tomorrow the real thing HURRAH!!

Till the next one learn something new,

Mark.

Friday 9 September 2011

The Good Long Friday.

Morning Strumpets,

So I`m tootling along nicely on my weekly jaunt to "the" ASDA, and accompanying me in a little Caraoke (thanks to a CD long ago compiled) are the Pixies, Frank Black, and The Breeders. All of a sudden Francis Monkman`s theme from "The Long Good Friday" blasts out. Tourettes Like just as it`s starting I shout " ERE, Howld ap, wayers Victoriaaaaah?" just as She`s seen in the other car getting driven away.

For the next two minutes, Bob`s in the back exploring the possibilities before resignedly accepting his fate. James Bond (who is now sat next to me in the passenger seat looking back at Bob with an air of arrogance yet deadly obedience) is going to shoot him. It`s at this point I have to get out the car and do the weekly shopping.

Welcome to my world.

Ironically, and this did make me laugh out loud whilst in "the" ASDA, in the third aisle, blocked in by an old woman reading at point blank range the contents of a Pot Noodle, her trolley left at a right angle. I could hear Louis Armstrong singing "With all the time in the world" through the tannoy.

Who said shopping couldn`t be entertaining.



Till the next one, learn something new.

Mark

Saturday 3 September 2011

Rat pack on The Road.

Afternoon Strumpets,

The past couple of weeks have been devoted to working out arrangements of Rat Pack classics for guitar and banjo following a request from a friend to play some at her "39th plus 1" birthday party last night. As little as a fortnight ago, I honestly didn`t think I was going to be able to manage it. These are big songs, and those chaps voices had a range as wide as Stretch Armstrong doing a bungee jump from the Grand Canyon. Then I got a slight throat infection. Then I tried on my tuxedo. Time somehow made it shrink. I can`t figure out how, but it`s happening a lot with my clothes lately. maybe we should change our washing powder (ahem, walks away sheepishly).

However as is (touch wood) the norm with these things, something clicked with the arrangements, the throat held out, and thanks to a little smoke and mirrors the Tux was salvagable. And what a night! 250 people in the most glamourous attire all out to have a good night. And Debi,(party lady) put on quite the evening. I went down pretty well, actually I`m stopping being modest, I went down really well. I`ll be posting the renditions of the Rat Pack stuff at a later date, though not from the night as I forgot to take me Bloggie!

Last Thursday The Charmers met up and had a really productive evening. Now summer holidays are finished with, I think we`re going to really push with getting our stuff "out there".

Here`s a first group attempt at a song I posted a month or so back.



Till the next one learn something new.

Mark.